The Ruby Knight Chronicles

The end of a love affair.  I'm flying back home to Australia this weekend, and I had planned on catching a bus to my ex's house and having him drop me off at the airport after spending a few days with him. But ever since we made those plans, I have been in two minds about it.  I really enjoyed our new years together and would have loved loved loved more time with him.  But... I felt my heart getting sucked right back into that tragic love bubble that it always weasels its way into. And after years of putting my wants before my best judgement, I've finally learnt that I can't keep putting myself into situations where I'm only bound to get hurt. Plus it'd mean 2 less days with my family, who will always be in my life, unlike menfolks. So tonight I text him and fessed up to being the owner of a hopelessly romantically pathetic little heart and that because of that embarrassing little fact, my plans have now changed and my mum will be driving me up to the ai...

When people don't like me, it really gets under my skin. I pride myself on being a people person. I like to be liked. I try hard to maintain relationships and would do anything to help a friend in need. Most of the time, I end up giving much more than I ever get back, and it's become such a common occurrence that I'm actually surprised when a friend is a friend back to me. And that's a little bit  depressing really.  Just recently a girl I thought was my friend, blocked me on Facebook. I've been there for her for work commitments, birthday parties, relationship struggles, tragedies, etc. And not once has she ever returned the favour. And I never expected her to. Looking back now, it's pretty obvious that she just used me, but that doesn't stop the hurt of being tossed aside without rhyme or reason. I don't have a lot of friends, and none in the area that I live. So the ones that I do give my friendship to, they usually mean much more to me ...

What is the point of life? Personally, I think it's to love. But often we forget that love isn't just of the romantic kind. For some reason, being single is considered a kind of social flaw. It's almost like if you're not with someone, then there must be something wrong with you. And all the days and events aimed at couples, like Valentine's Day, only add to those feelings of loneliness and inad equacy. The worst single lady moment for me is when another single soldier falls and becomes engaged, leaving the small group of us singles alone in the trenches forevermore, or at least until divorce. After 8 months of breakup recovery, I'm finally trying to work out how to do everything by myself again. Although if I'm being honest, I'm actually quite used to it because my last boyf wasn't so crash hot at the whole boyf thing. However the fact that I HAVE to do stuff alone now, whereas before I only PROBABLY had to do stuff alone, well, that fact isn...

Warning: this post is very NSFW. There's a lot of curse words and sexual references. In time you'll expect this from me, but for now I'll warn you. Like MTV does before every single godforsaken "reality" show they play instead of music. On Music TV. Yeaaaaaahhhh.... No one ever really teaches you how to bounce back after a serious relationship ends (rebounding seems a little risky when you live in a town inhabited mostly by your relatives so that's out for me). I've heard all the bullshit "time heals" nonsense cliches and not once has it ever helped me in any way at all when someone mentions it. It mostly makes me want to punch said cliche-giver in the face. With a brick. And then tell them "oooh but time heals, right?" Yeah ok so I may have some unresolved anger management issues. Probably. So after extensive research (few minutes perusing Google) all I seemed to find was the same old airy fairy hippylove hug the world fucking...